Parenting is a constant juggling act. One minute you’re a chef, the next you’re a nurse, a teacher, a therapist, or even a referee. Since no two kids are the same, there isn’t a universal rulebook for getting them to listen. However, one effective strategy many parents swear by is reverse psychology—a subtle yet powerful way to encourage positive behavior without resorting to strict discipline.

Want to know how to use this trick effectively? Keep reading as we explore seven clever ways to apply reverse psychology, when to use it, and why it works.

Reverse psychology is simple: you tell someone to do the opposite of what you actually want them to do. Kids, in particular, love exerting their independence, and when they feel like a decision is their own, they’re far more likely to go along with it.

For example, if your child refuses to help with chores, instead of demanding, “Clean your room now!” you can say, “You probably aren’t big enough to handle cleaning your room all by yourself.” More often than not, kids take the bait, proving that they can do it—without feeling forced.

Now, let’s look at seven practical ways to use reverse psychology in everyday parenting.

1. Make Healthy Foods More Tempting

Getting kids to eat vegetables can feel like an impossible battle, but what if you made it seem like they weren’t supposed to eat them?

Try saying something like:
“Oh no! Don’t eat all the broccoli! I was saving it for myself!”

Suddenly, broccoli becomes forbidden and way more appealing. Kids love the thrill of doing something “they’re not supposed to,” and before you know it, they’ll be munching away on their greens.

Video: Using Reverse Psychology To Get ANYTHING You Want

2. Turn Teeth Brushing Into a Challenge

If your child refuses to brush their teeth before bed, try a little reverse motivation.

Instead of nagging, say:
“You probably can’t brush your teeth better than me. I always win the tooth-brushing contest!”

Most kids love a challenge, and they’ll quickly rush to prove they can brush just as well—if not better—than you.

3. Get Them to Eat Faster With a Race

Does your child take forever to finish a meal? Instead of begging them to eat faster, turn it into a competition.

Say:
“I bet you can’t finish your dinner before I finish mine!”

Suddenly, eating isn’t a boring task—it’s a race! Just make sure they’re still chewing properly to avoid rushing too much.

4. Make Homework Seem More Fun Than Playtime

Kids love delaying homework, often choosing screen time or playing instead. Instead of forcing them to do their assignments, flip the script:

Say:
“I don’t know why you’d want to do homework after playing. That’s the most boring way to do it!”

This subtle shift in phrasing makes it sound like finishing homework first is the smarter, more exciting choice.

5. Use “Reverse” Choices to Encourage Cooperation

Sometimes, the issue isn’t what a child needs to do—it’s that they don’t want to be told how to do it. Kids crave independence, so giving them controlled choices helps them feel in charge.

Instead of saying, “Pick up your toys now!” try:
“Would you rather pick up your toys now or after bath time?”

Both options lead to the same result (cleaning up), but now your child feels like they’re making the decision—not just obeying orders.

6. Handle Tantrums With Unexpected Responses

If your child is throwing a tantrum over something minor, sometimes agreeing with their complaint in an exaggerated way can snap them out of it.

For example, if they’re upset about wearing a jacket, say:
“Oh no! You’re right! If you put on that jacket, you might get too warm and melt like an ice cube in the sun!”

This playful, dramatic response interrupts their frustration and redirects their attention. They might even giggle, making the whole ordeal easier to handle.

7. Reverse the “No” Into a “Yes”

If your child refuses to do something, rather than arguing, simply tell them they’re not allowed to do it.

For example, if they refuse to put on their shoes, try saying:
“Oh no! You can’t put your shoes on! There’s no way you can do it!”

Many kids immediately want to prove you wrong, leading them to do exactly what you wanted in the first place.

Reverse psychology can be an effective tool, but it should be used sparingly and playfully. If it’s overused, kids will catch on and may start feeling manipulated, leading to frustration or distrust.

Here’s when to use it wisely:
✔ For minor battles, like food, bedtime, or chores.
✔ With toddlers and young children, who are more likely to respond to playful challenges.
✔ To encourage independence, rather than controlling behavior.

But avoid using it:
When your child is visibly upset or struggling emotionally.
When they need guidance, rather than a trick.
In serious situations where direct communication is more effective.

While reverse psychology might seem like a playful trick, studies actually support its effectiveness.

One famous experiment involved telling children not to play with a certain toy. Instead of ignoring it, they became obsessed with the toy, proving that the moment something is off-limits, it becomes more desirable.

Another study gave kids five posters and told them to choose one. Later, researchers told them that one poster was no longer available—and suddenly, that was the only one they wanted.

These studies confirm that humans naturally resist being told what to do, which is why reverse psychology works so well!

If reverse psychology isn’t working or you want to try a different approach, focus on clear and honest communication instead.

Video: Parents, what’s your best example of reverse psychology on your kids that actually worked?

Here’s how:

• Explain the “why” – Kids are more likely to listen when they understand the reason behind a rule.
• Use polite requests – Instead of demanding, say, “Let’s clean up together” instead of “Clean up now!”
• Give choices – Instead of forcing them into something, offer options to help them feel in control.
• Use humor – Sometimes, laughing together is the best way to defuse tension.

Reverse psychology can be a fun and effective parenting tool, but like any strategy, it should be used in moderation. Kids are smart—they’ll eventually figure it out if it’s overused!

Instead of relying on it all the time, mix in open communication, choices, and positive reinforcement. The goal isn’t to trick kids, but to help them feel independent and motivated to make good choices on their own.

Next time you’re facing a parenting challenge, try a little reverse psychology—you might be surprised at how well it works!