For years, society has assumed that women are the ones who experience the most pain after a breakup. However, a fascinating new study has turned that belief upside down. According to recent research conducted by psychologists, men may actually take breakups harder than women.

Even more surprising, men are more likely to seek relationship advice and emotional support online. These findings challenge outdated stereotypes about masculinity and reveal just how deeply men feel heartbreak.

Video: Men vs Women in a Breakup: Who Suffers More?

Psychologists analyzed over 184,000 posts from the popular Reddit forum “r/relationships” to better understand how men and women handle relationship struggles. The results were eye-opening—55% of users seeking advice were men, while only 45% were women.

The most common topic? Heartbreak. While some discussions revolved around trust issues, intimacy, and personal growth, the overwhelming theme was emotional pain.

Why are men more likely to turn to online forums? The study suggests that anonymity plays a huge role. Many men feel safer expressing their emotions in digital spaces where they won’t be judged or ridiculed for their vulnerability.

Despite feeling heartbreak deeply, men often struggle to express their emotions due to social expectations. Society has long upheld the idea that “real men don’t cry,” making it difficult for them to open up about their pain in real life.

One Reddit user summed it up perfectly:

“Guys aren’t supposed to express sadness, so we typically keep it to ourselves. None of our friends want to hear about how much it sucks or how we wish things had gone differently.”

This emotional suppression can lead to longer-lasting pain. The study suggests that because men don’t often feel comfortable talking about their feelings in person, they turn to the internet for support.

While men are more likely to seek advice online, women process breakups differently. The study found that women tend to talk to close friends, family, or even therapists when dealing with heartbreak.

Another key difference? Women often wait until a relationship is in serious trouble before seeking help. Men, on the other hand, are more likely to reach out for advice while their relationship is still in the early stages of decline.

These patterns suggest that gender norms influence how people deal with emotional pain. Men, discouraged from showing vulnerability in real life, turn to online spaces. Women, on the other hand, rely more on personal networks for emotional support.

One of the most surprising findings from the study was that men appear to be more emotionally affected by heartbreak than women.

While women’s discussions often revolved around issues like mistreatment, finances, and household responsibilities, men talked more about emotional pain, personal struggles, and feelings of loss.

Charlotte Entwistle, lead author of the study, explained:

“The fact that heartbreak was the most common topic among men emphasizes that they are at least as emotionally affected by relationship problems as women—if not more.”

These findings suggest that while women may be more vocal about their struggles, men internalize their pain in ways that are less visible but equally intense.

The study also examined how men and women talk about their relationships. The results revealed an interesting contrast.

Women used more self-focused language, often expressing doubts and concerns through statements using “I.” This pattern is linked to preoccupied attachment styles, where individuals feel anxious about relationships and often question their self-worth.

Video: Breaking Up: Men Vs. Women

Men, on the other hand, used words like “we” more frequently and expressed more positive emotions about their relationships. This suggests that men may generally feel more secure in their romantic partnerships.

However, the study also found that dismissive attachment styles—where individuals emotionally detach from relationships—were more common among men. This means that while many men invest deeply in their relationships, others distance themselves emotionally as a coping mechanism.

Dr. Ryan Boyd, the study’s lead researcher, hopes these findings will help reshape the outdated notion that men are emotionally indifferent in relationships.

“When you remove the traditional social stigmas against men for seeking help and sharing their emotions, you see that they are just as invested in working through rough patches in their relationships as women.”

These findings reveal that men care deeply about their relationships, they feel heartbreak just as intensely—if not more so—than women, and they want to work through their emotional struggles.

This study challenges long-held assumptions about how men and women experience breakups. While women are often seen as more emotionally expressive, research suggests that men may actually suffer more after a breakup.

Video: Top G explains why men suffer more with a breakup than a woman does

By breaking down outdated gender norms and encouraging open emotional expression, we can create a world where both men and women feel safe to process heartbreak in their own way.

At the end of the day, breakups hurt—regardless of gender. But by understanding how people cope differently, we can all become more supportive of each other during difficult times.